While I know they've been deprived, and my natural impulse is to buy them anything they want, I also know that it's not good for them to be spoiled. It's a tough balance every day, finding the line between doing what's best for them and what they want.

I had a good taste of the perils of being too lenient. During Christmas break, I relaxed the family rules about candy to allow more than one piece a day. By the time the boys went back to school, all they wanted to eat was candy. Zack would wake me up at 4:00 in the morning, saying, "Daddy, candy?" and then crying when I said no. They lost touch with most other rules, too, even the ones that I hadn't purposely relaxed.

The first week after New Year's, they had no candy or gum at all, and magically everything went back to normal, except that Zack keeps calling me "Bad Daddy" when I say no to candy or buying him a $500 motorized kiddie car. Oh, well, in time he'll understand.

Their favorite presents were the bikes. I'd purchased them three months ago and had them in the garage. Nicky kept looking at the boxes and asking if the bikes were for them. Cruel parent that I am, I said no, they were for Uncle Steve.

"Uncle Steve TWO bikes?" Nicky asked incredulously.

I explained that since Uncle Steve was so big, and the bikes were so small, that Uncle Steve rode with one foot on each bike.

I don't think Nicky ever believed me, but he eventually stopped asking about the boxes. The boys are finally learning to have a sense of humor (they barely smiled when I met them, and didn't "get" any jokes at all), and one of their favorite things now is to say something outrageous, then burst into laughter and say, "Just kidding!"

On Christmas day, I had them clean up all the mess and take the bags to the outdoor garbage can. While passing through the garage with the bags over their shoulders, they found the bikes all assembled, gleaming, and begging to be ridden. Nicky said, "Hey, bikes, hey!" and kept walking. He was too shocked to believe he had discovered another present.

The shock only lasted a moment, and they were off and riding. Of course they had their share of wobbles, spills, and torn knees, but within a few days they were going full-speed ahead and ready to have the training wheels put in the highest position. They probably put on 50 miles in the first week (we had very mild weather right after Christmas) just going up and down the sidewalk in front of the house.

The last two events of the season were Daddy's birthday and New Year's Eve.

For my birthday, Zack did much better (probably because it wasn't Nicky getting the presents). Nicky and Zack sang Happy Birthday to me from the moment I woke up until late that night. It doesn't get cuter than that!

On New Year's Eve we stayed up until midnight to watch fireworks on TV. The boys were so fried by then that they danced and danced. Nicky learned to leap and whirl, and Zack learned to leap and fall, and they had a wonderful time. By one thirty in the morning they had settled down enough to sleep.

Since then we've been recovering our routines. The boys are back in school, we're following the posted meal menu, and candy is back to being an occasional treat. Nicky lost his second baby tooth, and Zack's chancre sore completely disappeared.

I had a brief stint in the hospital for an operation on my stomach, and Nicky missed me so much that he insisted on sleeping with me the night I got back. Do you have any idea how sweet it is to have a seven-year-old curl around you, pat your cheek, and whisper, "My Daddy I missed you" over and over? Do you have any idea how often that same boy's elbow can find your incisions? I didn't sleep very much, but I didn't have the heart to make him go to his own bed, either.

We're still muddling along, and I think it's going okay.