17 September 2004 - Zack's Birthday

If you recall, there was some confusion about birthdays when I adopted Zack. In Kyiv, they told me Zack's birthday was 01 December 1999, making him 4.5 years old. In Gadyach, the orphanage records showed 01 January 1999, making him 5.5 years old.

Everyone in Gadyach assured me that the Kyiv records were wrong, and that some clerk had made a typo. I went along with the advice from the orphanage and my facilitator, and left the official birthday 01 January.

Zack would be small for either 4.5 or 5.5, but that's not uncommon with kids who've been neglected then spent two years in an orphanage. Developmental delay is almost universal in those circumstances. For the orphanage alone, the average is to fall behind one month for every three or four months in the institution.

Behaviorially, cognitively, and emotionally, Zack is somewhere between three and four years old. His social skills are splintered, with some areas more developed than others, but he's clearly not anywhere near five and a half and ready for school.

The dentist said Zack's teeth were such that he could be anywhere between four and six, but that due to developmental delay, he couldn't be much more precise without extensive testing. Even then, we'd only have averages to compare Zack's development with, and genetics can play havoc with any one individual's comparison to same-age peers.

The pediatrician agreed with the dentist's assessment, and said we could do a wrist-bone X-ray, but that the margin of error in that method of dating was up to six months either direction. I'd been told three months before, but faced with a six-month variance, and a possible time-frame of only one year, it didn't make much sense to proceed with further testing.

The more I've observed Zack, the unhappier I've been with all of this. His size and development really indicate a 4.5 year old running 6-8 months behind the curve because of the institutionalization.

This morning for the first time, I got all caught up with work and sleep, had Nicky at school and Zack at the park with his nanny, and had some time to go through all the paperwork I collected in Ukraine.

To my dismay (but not really to my surprise), I discovered that the only records that said 01 January were from the orphanage. The initial police investigation, the original birth certificate, the order revoking parental rights, and the immunization records all had 01 December 1999 for Zack's birthday.

Unfortunately, all of the paperwork done since 08 July (the adoption decree, the new birth certificate, the UA passport, the US passport, and every other kind of official record) uses the 01 January date.

Fortunately, I still have an opportunity to fix things. Since I'm in the process getting ready to go before a Texas judge to get a recognition of foreign decree, I can ask the Texas judge to order a correction. Assuming this is granted, then Zack's Texas-issued birth certificate will have the correct date. Using the judge's order, I can have his US passport and social security records adjusted, too.

I have asked the lawyers to amend the petition to include a change of birthday for Zack. All available indicia point toward his being 4.5.